Duty
by celeste9
Summary: On a cold night in a war, Riou gets an unexpected visit from someone who knows better than anyone what he feels.


The night was cold and the wind blew fiercely. Most likely there would be rain in the morning, if not sooner. Riou wouldn't have cared, though, were the skies to open up and drench him. He needed the solitude, and probably wouldn't even notice the rain.

He sighed quietly when he heard someone walk up next to him. The slight build and the green bandana signaled that it was Tir McDohl. _Great, _Riou thought. _Someone who thinks he can make me feel better, who thinks he knows what I'm going through. _Riou turned to leave the rooftop.

"Wait, Riou," Tir said softly. It had always somewhat disconcerted Riou, the muted tone that held so much authority. "I know you don't want anyone to talk to you, but just give me a few minutes."

Back still facing the other boy, Riou bowed his head and stood still. He guessed it couldn't hurt to stay, at least for a little while.

"I know, you know. I get it."

Riou had to strain to hear, and he almost went back to the ledge in order to hear better.

"You don't think I understand, but I know exactly how you feel. To have everyone looking up to you, counting on you to make the right decisions. To lose the one person you needed the most, the one person who understood you…"

Riou flinched, and then he did turn around. "Shut up! You _don't _know! You're some great 'hero'; you don't know anything about how it is for me! I don't have a clue what needs to be done, and I don't _care _anymore. Nanami is _dead _because I didn't know what to do and I'm sick of it! I'm sick of this whole stupid war and I won't have it anymore!"

Tir stood silently while the other boy ranted, letting him release his anger. He stood breathing heavily, and then Tir said, "I get it all, Riou. I'm not the great leader everyone says I am. I was just as clueless as you. Without Mathiu, we never would have won. They never tell you about the hard parts. You only hear how I led the army. They don't tell you how afraid I was, how my first time ordering troops I clammed up and couldn't say a word. So I _get _it."

Stunned into silence, Riou stared wide-eyed at the bearer of the Soul Eater. "You were scared?"

Smiling a little, Tir nodded. "Yeah, I was scared. I was no older than you, and they wanted me to command an army of adults? I always thought they were crazy, thinking I could do it."

Riou laughed. "I _know _Jowston is crazy, letting me do it. I was in the Highland Youth Brigade!" He stepped up to the ledge, resting his hands against it. "How did you do it?"

Tir shrugged. "I don't know. Luck, I guess. Plenty of help. I did what I thought was right, and that's all you can do."

"But I don't _want _to do it anymore. Nanami… my sister…"

"I know, Riou. When Gremio died, I thought the same. How could I continue fighting without him? He was always the one who looked after me, who listened to what I had to say, kept me from going insane. I thought I'd be lost without him. But the war was important. I had to live for Gremio, as much as that thought sickened me the more I heard it."

"But Gremio came back," Riou said bitterly. "There's no magic to bring Nanami back."

"I know," Tir sighed. After a lingering pause, he went on, "At least you'll never have to kill your father." Sensing his companion's shock, he explained, "I guess you wouldn't really know the story. We fought all the generals of the Empire, and my father, Teo McDohl, was the one who wouldn't go against the Emperor. So I killed him."

"You killed your father?" Riou still couldn't comprehend the thought. Killing Genkaku? It didn't even bear thinking about. "And yet you went on?"

"I had to. It was my _duty,_" the young McDohl nearly spat out. "So I know what it's like, for you to have to fight your friend. You end up on opposite sides, neither willing to back down. I hope your story has a happier ending than mine."

Riou's mind was overrun with thoughts, trying to process everything he'd learned. Numb with the pain of Nanami's death and the idea of battling Jowy, there was hardly room for what Tir had told him. Tir had never seemed so real before, but now Riou could see they were just the same. Struggling in a grown-up world, forced to grow up before their time, losing people they loved. Perhaps ten minutes before, he had been ready to give up the fight, but now, after hearing of the pain Tir had survived…

Was it worth it? Was it worth it for he himself to suffer to save a country that wasn't even his own? Who was to say he was even right, who was to say Jowy was wrong? Tir had spoken of his duty- why had it been given to them? Could not others do better?

Tir, obviously, had believed enough in what he was doing to sacrifice all that he had. Would Riou be strong enough to do the same? If he had to kill Jowy… Would he be able to do it?

As the rain began to splatter against the castle walls, Riou and Tir remained standing outside. What was a little discomfort in comparison to the pain they'd already lived through?


End file.
